Forget Nice—Be Genuine

The Strength of Authenticity

I used to try to be nice to everyone.  I found myself using white lies to appease other people while holding in my true thoughts and emotions. People would compliment me by saying what a nice guy I was—"Johnny gets along with everyone."

After my daughter was born, I soon realized that this approach was deception. Something about becoming a father made me understand that I did not want my child to be nice like I had been. So, I changed and began to speak my truth. This made life so much easier, which helped me to gain internal strength.

That's me in my dad's arms being nice!

I soon began to see myself as more real—people looked at me differently. This translated into modeling self-confidence, which, in turn, allowed a more natural self-discovery for my little child, Anna.

By giving her honest answers to everything we experienced she grew up with a self-determination that encouraged curiosity and the natural empowerment of truth. I started to say, "I don't know" much more! Accepting the fact that I was not hiding anything inside, I was being genuine to myself and everyone I touched. With Anna, the "I don't knows" were often followed by, "But why don't we find out!"

Make Your Own Hummus—Let Your Children In On The Fun!

Humming Hummus

One of my all time favorite concoction to eat is hummus.  

It is delicious, nutritious and tastes nothing like chicken!

Classic hummus

Rightfully so—a child’s taste buds should be opened to a variety of foods—so, use hummus as a go to snack of humongous proportions! Mostly used as a dip, an assortment of edible digging utensils adds to the lovely nutritive value of this chow. Skip those salty potato chips—instead have your children cut cucumber chips, slice up carrot, celery, and sweet pepper sticks—even radish slices. Rad right! Use your own favorite vegetables for the children to clean, prep and eat as hummus scoops. Come to think of it, I’ve used tomato wedges also! Pita wedges are popular but I don't use them—prefer blue corn chips—infusing some Tex-Mex flavors (see Additional Ingredients list below.)

Free Range Learning (2 of 3)

Free Range Learning

How Homeschooling Changes Everything

Introduction

Although Free Range Learning was written as a handbook for parents contemplating or already taking the home schooling initiative, any parent, teacher, or professional in the field of education would do well to read this gem. It could change your entire way of living, let alone thinking, as this book asks first and foremost for a more benevolent and serene world. I’m in.

Due to the extensive material I wanted to include, I will split this post into three separate posts. This

is part two of three. Part three will follow tomorrow, with a fourth post containing all three parts in one. Part one of three was posted yesterday.

Slow down, and smell the curiosity...

Trust, Empathy and Cooperation

ü  Demonstrating our trust in our children sends them a potent message.

ü  This is a continuum that begins at birth. When a parent is consistently responsive to a baby’s cries, the infant forms a sense of security.

ü  Infants have a biological need to be held, carried and cared for tenderly.

Ø  Deprivation of physical comfort in the formative years is a root cause of violence.

Ø  Infants and toddlers often spend many hours a day in car seats, carriers and other restraint devices.

Introducing 'Ping Parenting'

The Equator of Life

"The middle region of our being is the temperate zone. 

We may climb into the thin and cold realm of pure geometry and lifeless science, 

or sink into that of sensation. 

Between these extremes is the equator of life, of thought, of spirit, of poetry, 

— a narrow belt."

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Ping Parenting

An ideal situation for a newborn growing up over the first five years of life—before formalized schooling—would be to have adults who were not 'Helicopter' parents, who were not authoritarian parents, who were not neglectful parents. There is a sweet spot in-between for the ideal parent, and therefore, the ideal environment for children.

The sweet spot on a baseball bat is about a third of the way down from the end or tip of the bat. This is where the ball upon contact will 'ping' off the bat and soar back in jubilation!

Thoughts From A Four Month Old

A Day In the Life of a Baby

Night Time: Family Sleep

Throughout the night my mommy and daddy toss and turn sending ripples over the bed. I rise and fall to their movements—kind of like inside mama those nine months—a roller coaster of good times! I’m only four months old, so I can’t sit-up or even rollover just yet, but I do try. I tell you, it is so nice to be able to feel my parents' loving warmth as I go in and out of dreamland throughout the night. My mama is always there to feed me her milk when I feel like a snack.

How does that thumb taste?

Morning Time

When my parents get up out of bed for the day, I like to just lie there, like a lazy lout, watching their movements and listening to their conversation. I can’t understand a word but it’s fascinating to watch their lips, facial expressions and hand movements. With the help of body movments and the tone of their voices, I feel like I understand somehow. When papa leans over to nestle his face into my belly, I can’t help but squeal in delight. But sometimes I get a bit zealous and grab his hair

I'm on my elbows! 

which causes him to say, “Hey, Anna, don’t pull daddy’s hair, please. He hasn’t got much left as it is.” I smile and begrudgingly let go, with prodding from dad’s finger. We play a lot of grab and let go games since I can’t do much else—except kick!

Baby Brains Love Bach—Later Mozart

Music Matters: The Bach Effect*

 Introduction:

Music helps electrical activity in newborn children’s brains to resonate—laying the neural pathways that create a better foundation for learning a variety of cerebral skills. The relationship between music and brain development is significant at many levels. Dr. Rebecca Shore's Developing Young Minds: From Conception to Kindergarten devotes almost one third of her book to this theme. 

Bonding at its Best

Dancing to music with your baby before they begin to crawl is a natural inclination for parents, and they couldn’t be more right. By being exposed to a variety of pitch, tempo and rhythm, the baby will absorb variations in cadence—layers of complexity in pattern recognition—through the 

adult’s body movements in conjunction to what they hear. As the baby sways, swings, rocks, and turns to music, spatial-temporal perception development is enhanced—as is joy and laughter. 

Hey, Mr. Bach—could you play this in D major?

The Universal Language: Music

Music is often referred to as the universal language. In fact, most likely, musical expression preceded speech. Regardless of what language we speak or culture we were raised in, music can make us feel elated, depressed, calm, and can reduce us to tears.  

Going Beyond A Present

Gifts of Creative Love Take a Bit Extra—So Worthwhile!

My father would write a short poem on my birthday card or on a present at Christmas time—in the form of a clue to the mysterious gift inside. It became a family tradition that I have carried on with much pleasure. Today, I often write a longer poem onto an anniversary card for my wife or a graduation or birthday for a relative. My wife and daughter have caught onto the ritual, with gratification, often returning the favor. 

It makes all the difference. In fact, this thoughtful act is a present in itself—the time and effort is so much appreciated by the receiver.

Thanks, Shel Silverstein

 Acts Of Kindness Only Take Moments

Youth Library Cards

Common Sense is the New Wisdom 

Hop on down to the local library

with toddler in tow

Scoot on over to the librarian

with toddler on toe

Order a library card in toddler's name

Then dance and hoot 

until you get the boot!

PGB

Papa, please put my library card on our refrigerator with a really good magnet

It came as rather a surprise when I read an article in The University of Washington's Columns magazine about "The New Mindset, Turning Research Into Better Living." The first example of UW's "innovation imperative" was a nursing professor who "discovered" that premature babies gained weight and developed faster if they were rocked and could hear the sound of a heartbeat.

Finding Awe In Children

The Fear in Awe

When we become parents for the first time we experince awe in all its glory. The reverence of something greater than ourselves. The admiration of a living miracle. Also, the fear about everything connected to becoming a parent... fear that we won't know how to handle the baby, fear that we aren't

Build Trust - Be Honest

Children Deserve Our Truth

Teacher Tom's Demanding Truth post is a powerful testament to building a relationship with your child based on honesty. Children want sincerity. They want a mom and dad who they can trust.

It doesn't mean they require you to be right about everything. It does mean they don't want you to pretend to know when you don't, or even more importantly for young children, to pretend to not know when you do. 

Hold Me Like You'll Never Let Me Go

 The Babywearing Mindset 

Introduction - The "In-Arms"stage of a child

Hey pops, I've heard about you!

The child passes through successive phases of development in which her surroundings have an important part to play. In none have they more importance than the "in-arms" phase, the period from birth to when the child begins sitting and then crawling by herself—generally this is at six to nine months of age.

(Major Papa Green Bean point) - The in-arms phase as part of a continuum can be descibed as a second nine month gestation period, giving the human baby an eighteen month period of full gestation, with the actual birth being the half way point. This is a remarkably insightful concept and, if understood for its implications, leads us as parents and childcare providers to a much more respectful and nurturing welcome for the newborn child onto our living world. 

What Do Toddlers Need To Thrive?

In Sync With Understanding Young Children: 

Seattle's Teacher Tom and Zurich's Department Of Education 

Exploration takes courage and a little attitude!

1) Teacher Tom writes a great blog sharing his inside world of pre-school adventure and child rearing secrets. One of his most recent posts, Echoes, is a real powerful example of how to handle a child's dilemma with a playmate. The three year old child, himself, displays an amazing sense of patience, perseverance, and respect. As Tom points out, clearly there has been excellent parental role modeling at this 3 year olds home. This post brought tears to my eyes, it was so beautiful.


2) Konstantin Bahr, head of the division of Educational Planning in The Department of Education in Zurich, Switzerland just released a series of 40 short videos with many language choices that shares incredibly simple, but profound, insights as how to interact with very young children.

Bahr asks the question, "What do toddlers need to thrive?".

Your Thoughts On 'Paternity Leave'?

Michael Roston, a social media editor at The New York Times posted an article today, which happens to be March 17th, or better know as St. Patricks Day. I loved his plea for help, and think his daughter is lucky to have him as a caring dad. He asks the question, How Do I Make the Most from My Paternity leave?.