Wednesday, May 7, 2014

JJ's Sad Story

baby, new born, early childhood, first-time parents
JJ is born curious

JJ, a seven pound little boy, is born into the world completely helpless. First of all, he is taken into very capable hands in the care of professional doctors and nurses.

Then JJ goes home.

JJ’s household is filled with smoke and arguments. There is little touching, little laughter except the canned kind from the TV, little eye contact, little to grasp, little explanation of life, and little human touch. A rubber, sugared ‘pacifier’ incessantly popped into his mouth, mutes JJ’s babbles. There are few smiles, few trips to the park, few books read out loud, few people to pick JJ up, talk to him and play with him, few chances to touch all the magical textures he desperately wants to. There is plenty of static.

The months go by, JJ begins to crawl. The "no's" begin in earnest. Restrictions stifling JJ’s natural urge to explore begin to pile up from the frustrated, uninformed adults. JJ's natural impulses of curiosity continue to push him, searching bland surroundings.

As JJ reaches two, he is expressing himself with words that come slowly; he begins to find comfort with his most constant companion... the television.

One of JJ's dreams
Now three, JJ is growing and able to run with gusto when let loose in the park. But, he is not allowed to climb trees. His parent exclaims, "Those trees have sap so you'll soil your pants & you'll fall so I'll have to take you to the hospital". JJ glances back at two children gleefully climbing the tree’s branches, before walking away, head down.

Four years old now, JJ is looking forward to his reward.  He has not talked to his parents for two full hours, so they could take an afternoon nap. His special meal, at his favorite restaurant, is a yummy hamburger, tasty fries and a delicious bubbly soda pop. He slurps it down in big gulps and runs over to the soda dispenser for more. "Hey! Get back here”, yell his parents, “I'll get you more, you'll just spill it all over the floor like a klutz".

Soon, it is JJ’s fifth birthday. He is so excited! Trying to reach a balloon as he quickly climbs a chair, it tips over, toppling into a table and spilling a drink. "Now see what you've done!" screams a parent. A swift smack on the back of the head sends JJ into the arm of the tipped chair. JJ sits there rubbing his side. Then he looks up, with sullen eyes, and asks, "how soon 'till my party?” "We'll cancel it if you keep misbehaving.  Now, why don't you get out of our hair and watch some TV".

It's the first day of Kindergarten. JJ enters the classroom with trepidation. Ms. Pickford smiles at little JJ, "Welcome to Kindergarten, JJ. How are you?" JJ glances up at Ms. Pickford and shrugs his shoulders.

Papa Green Bean Conclusion

JJ's home is where his life's journey will be determined. And, it mainly depends on how well his parents create a culture of encouragement for JJ, their new arrival.

JJ’s parents may be a struggling couple in their 20's, a single teenager girl living in an affluent neighborhood with her parents, a gay or lesbian couple in their 40's, any number of combinations are possible. And, it really doesn't matter who it is, to JJ.

Why doesn't JJ care who his parents are? Because it’s not who they are, it’s how they treat him.

 JJ lives in an unconscious world during the first years of life. He absorbs his nearby environment and molds himself. And, this psychological & physiological incarnation depends on the positive life force flowing around him. Every hour of every day matters for the first years of life.  JJ’s brain development is critically dependent on the healthy stimulation it receives. 

JJ did not receive his due.

Please share your reaction to this story. I welcome all comments.
Cheers, Papa Green Bean